It’s time for reuniting with family, turkey, holiday cheer, pumpkin pie and giving thanks. For some, it’s also a time for anxiety related to changes in routine, distress surrounding food, and tension between family members. Let’s discuss how to navigate the Thanksgiving holiday when stress, anxiety and fear arise.

1. Keep in mind that it’s only one day

When you wake up on Thanksgiving Day, nourish yourself with an adequate breakfast. You'll have more stamina and energy to cope with stress-inducing situations as a result. Society has also normalized the behaviors associated with disordered eating. The holiday might feel stressful due to the simultaneous pressures of consuming entirely different dishes than your norm and feeling guilty about eating larger servings. Even though it’s Thanksgiving, your body still needs to be nourished with three meals. Instead of skipping meals or trying to compensate, give yourself permission for one of those meals to be your Thanksgiving meal for the day. Practice mindful eating by observing the varied textures, aromas, and colors on your plate and take a few minutes to pause in the midst of your meal to check in with your hunger, how full you are, and how much you are enjoying the food.

2. Identify and reach out to your support system 

Identify one person who will be at the holiday gathering or 2-3 people outside of the gathering who you feel safe with. It may be a member of your family or a close friend who understands what you're going through and who you can quickly draw aside or who you can sit next to for support. If the individual is a friend or family who lives outside of your household and will not be there physically, make a plan with them ahead of time so that they can be reached by phone or text in case you need to reach out. 

3. Check in with how you’re feeling and take breaks

Pause, observe and acknowledge what you’re feeling. What are some practices that normally help you decompress and calm you? Determine ahead of time which coping methods you will implement in order to effectively manage a situation that is emotionally taxing or overwhelming. Set aside time for yourself to recharge. Allow yourself to step away for even 10-15 minutes to practice a breathing exercise, watch a funny video, text a friend, or ground yourself with a short walk. Schedule therapy before or after the holidays. Friends may be a source of comfort, but they frequently lack objectivity and have biased opinions about your circumstances. Your therapist has the ability to affirm your experience without endorsing harmful coping mechanisms.

4. Establish your boundaries 

After identifying potential boundary violations, practice appropriate responses. If the discussion starts to go toward topics that are off-limits for you, such as diet or weight talk or politics, be prepared with a few topics to bring up, such as a trip you’re looking forward to. It’s ok to have a simple phrase ready of “I prefer to talk about something else.” It might be helpful to have some prepared replies ready for when you encounter challenging topics. Keep an open heart toward loved ones who discuss these troublesome topics, but maintain firm limits. 

It is natural to feel anxious throughout the holiday season. With a little preparation, you can both enjoy the holiday and embrace a spirit of gratitude. 

Authored By:

Julianna Robinson, LCSW